Feeling Blah

It’s the middle of May and 70 degrees still seems imaginative. It’s Sunday and I have this to do and that to do. Frankly, I’m grumpy. I have a serious attack of the I-don’t-wannas. Worse, I read the newspaper and that is usually a depressing idea – no, a depressing reality.

Fortunately, I have a wife who won’t abide me in this mood for more than a paragraph or so and she always says whatever I need to hear to wake me up (often something as subtle as, “Michael – Wake up!”) So that’s what I’m thinking about – the idea of waking up.

There’s no accounting for being in a blah-mood. I mean, there are reasons. But there are always reasons, no better than today’s and no worse than today’s. There are also reasons for not being in that discouraging mood, no better and no worse than all the others. Having a ‘reason-scale’ makes no sense. I have never heard of anyone ever changing a mood by logic.

But there is one question that never fails to wake me up. And that is, “Who am I being?” or “Who do I want to be?” I always have a choice. I can be my moods, which change more frequently than the weather, or I can be my choice.

For most of us this is hard – choice? –Choose what? I’m lucky that way. I have said what my choice will be. I choose love and contribution, wisdom and harmony. When I don’t see one of those things going on at the moment I’ll at least see what I can do that manifests or includes some of them, like writing this.